Saturday, November 19, 2011

Troubled Childhood - The Breeding Ground for Adult Sexual Abuse


The very institutions that are supposed to protect our citizens from harm are now embroiled in conflict as they contend with the secrecy and shame of sexual abuse. The fabric of our culture has been shaken to the core by the perpetration and deception surrounding sexual assault.

What needs to be a healthy sexual instinct and act has become a deadly, destructive weapon when it is used by those who are not conscious of the depth of their inner-darkness. One’s "seedy-side," in need of transformation, remains sublimated rather than redeemed. Twisted thoughts, urges and behaviors get linked to sexual desires that should be wholesome and foster a positive connection with our most intimate, significant others.

We have been down this path before, and yet continue the destruction. Sexual abuse and secrecy have rocked the Catholic Church, and more recently, educational entities and institutions such as Jerry Sandusky and Penn State University, and governmental entities and individuals, such as the alleged activities of presidential contender, Herman Cain.

I believe this sordid mess starts as a family problem. A troubled childhood is the breeding ground for most adult sexual abuse. What doesn’t get processed in the past, gets replayed as a toxic narrative in the here-and-now. The same worn-out scripts or adverse childhood experiences get activated and are linked to inappropriate, stunted sexual development and behavior. Adult perpetrators of sexual abuse are not able to stop their activity, because they have never responsibly addressed the full emotional impact of the abuse directed towards them.

Like a bad video, sexual abuse gets passed down from one generation to the next unless the process is consciously altered. It takes supreme courage for those who have been abused, through parental neglect and aggression, to deal with their own fallout so they don't offend others in adulthood. It is every adult’s responsibility to seek help for their own troubled childhood experiences.

Sexual abusers experience fallout from bad parenting, with characteristics of extreme power and control, emotional unavailability, hostility and aggression, and harsh, critical treatment. Some are exploited sexually, but many are wounded in other ways. With their spirit broken from childhood, these to-be-offenders are primed due to angry, shame-based feelings connected to childhood trauma.

Adults who have experienced abuse during childhood can process the past and learn to release the shame and blame that haunts them. With support, they can learn to reframe their present thinking and behavior and treat themselves and others in a healthy manner.

If our society is to be restored from the vestiges of sexual abuse, we must all be committed to preventive strategies and interventions, and vigilant reporting, to make sure that our citizens, including children are shielded from potential harm of sexual predators.

Thursday, November 17, 2011

Pennsylannia, Penn State: Living in the Land of an Altered Reality


Denial is a powerful thing. It is a reaction to painful, disturbing realities that are seemingly too great to bear. For the short term, it appears more emotionally palatable to live in the land of an altered reality than to confront one's inner demons and courageously process them.

The stakeholders in the state of Pennsylvania and Penn State University appear to be living a lie - a massive fabrication filled with ineptness and endless cover-ups. In typical fashion, the perpetrators of childhood sexual abuse, and those who suppress it, have their power and control protected at the expense of our young people. The innocence and trust of our children continue to be shattered as those in a role of authority find ways to irreparably damage them.

The state of Pennsylvania is in no position to effectively address the Sandusky problem, since their laws and execution of them are at the core of the scandal. It is a kin to asking the Catholic Church to police its own ranks. Only the judicial department of the federal government can sort out this mess and clarify for all of us what happened and how it played out.

The state of Pennsylvania is culpable based upon its ambiguous statutes regarding mandated reporting of abuse. In most state statutes "all individuals" are to take responsibility for reporting suspected child abuse to child protective state agencies and the police. Severe penalties for not reporting eyewitness accounts and alleged information about sexual abuse are a punishable offense. In some states, failures to report suspected sexual abuse is considered a felony. The impotent Pennsylvania law permits reporters an easy excuse by merely requiring that those working in institutional settings pass the alleged information along to immediate superiors. Apparently, this latest version of the Pennsylvania statute was supposedly considered an improvement over the previous child abuse reporting law. This doesn't bode well for the competency and insight of Pennsylvania legislators. The statute is set up for failure. It allows those individuals with powerful information to begin the denial process by using the passing of time and the mechanism of one’s selective memory to spring into action. It was the responsibility of Mike McQueary to immediately call the police and child protective services regarding his eyewitness account of Jerry Sandusky's locker room rape of a young child. The archaic Pennsylvania statute allowed professionals at Penn State University to play "hot potato" with the lives of our children. By the time the information reached the university president, we can only speculate on how deluded the toxic message became.

McQueary now wants us to believe that he contacted the police and tried to stop the sexual abuse as indicated in an email he sent to a friend. Had he merely picked up the phone on day one and called the police or child protective services, they would have asked him a host of questions to get to the bottom of Jerry Sandusky's behavior towards the child in the Penn State locker room. Rather than make the contact, McQueary met with Joe Paterno, whose remarks before the grand jury about Jerry Sandusky's behavior had already been toned down and compromised. It appears clear that through minimization and deception, Penn State University officials, from the top down, felt the need to protect their football culture from a sordid affair perpetrated by a coach who no longer works there.

If anyone has doubts about Jerry Sandusky's culpability in abusing children, one only needs to listen to the interview with Bob Costas of NBC Sports. When Costas asked Sandusky if he had a sexual affinity for young boys, Sandusky repeated the question several times and dodged and weaved through each response. It was an awkward interview, set up by an obvious inept attorney in hopes of doing damage control.

Furthermore, due to a judge with a conflict of interest, Jerry Sandusky is free on $100,000 bond without even meeting the minimal court requirements for alleged sex offenders of an ankle bracelet. Jerry Sandusky appears to have used the power of his volunteer organization dedicated to working with-risk kids, to sexually prey on the neediest of children.

At every level, this tragedy represents a breakdown consisting of denial and deception within Pennsylvania government and the Penn State University institutional setting. To create a sense of civility, responsibility and accountability, all entities dealing with our children must courageously step forward to encourage, support and protect those who have the most to lose - our children. When will we learn to face boldly, the ravages of childhood sexual abuse? When will we stop the denial and deception and quit living in the land of an altered reality?

Wednesday, November 09, 2011

Penn State, Joe Paterno and the Pennsylvania 'Pass the Buck' Law


We live in a culture riddled with secrecy, denial and childhood sexual abuse. The revelations and reality about the pattern of institutional cover-ups at Penn State University underscore the nature of the problem. The voice of children, who are the victims of sexual abuse, are often disregarded and invalidated. The power of denial transcends the painful reality of violating our most valuable, yet vulnerable resource. Often, parents, schools, community caretakers and agencies are more interested in protecting the perpetrators of abuse than in seeing justice rendered. It's unfortunate, but in a litigious society the wheels of justice are more likely to be granted to the most powerful players.

Unfortunately, it is human nature for those who are first-hand witnesses of sexual abuse to deny, minimize, or avoid its impact; this is also true for those who are potential reporters who have been provided with first-hand information regarding suspected sexual abuse, such as the case with Joe Paterno. Rather than standing tall as a mandated reporter (along with assistant Mike McQueary), he decided to follow the letter of Pennsylvania law, absolving himself of responsibility by seeking to pass the information along to "higher authorities."

Most states have mandatory reporting laws that address this problem of potential reporters trying to shirk their responsibility. In Arizona, the key phrase in the mandatory reporting law is "any person” is obligated to report suspected abuse. In other words, most everyone constitutes a mandated reporter and penalties for not reporting are severe.

It appears that in the Pennsylvania mandated reporting law, those individuals who work in institutional settings are provided an "out" by merely mandating that personnel such as educators pass suspected abuse information to their superiors. This distinction in the Pennsylvania reporting law creates a loophole, which is disturbing. At Penn State University, rather than holding first-hand responders responsible for reporting suspected abuse, the Pennsylvania statute let Paterno and McQueary off the hook and gave them the opportunity to dilute the information as they passed it on to their administrative superiors.

I am not suggesting that Penn State administrators, including the university president, are not culpable for what occurred. Rather, I am making a case that Mike McQueary and Joe Paterno had a legal and ethical responsibility to report suspected abuse and were provided a legal escape through Pennsylvania law.

According to Mike McQueary, he witnessed a horrific scene within the locker room at Penn State University. He viewed a child being sodomized by former assistant football coach, Jerry Sandusky. He supposedly found the situation so repulsive, that he fled the locker room. Due to his eyewitness account, McQueary had the most significant role and obligation to report the alleged sexual abuse to the police and child protective services. Joe Paterno received first-hand information about the alleged sexual abuse from McQueary and should have collaborated with him to report it. According to most state’s child protective service protocols, "any person" should be obligated to report suspected child abuse - including Joe Paterno, who had first-hand knowledge relayed to him about the heinous acts of Jerry Sandusky.

Once again, we are witnessing the ugly side of college sports and institutional cover-ups. It is obvious that the NCAA is being tarnished by the behavior of many players and coaches. I find it mystifying and yet understandable, that the Penn State University administrators, including the president, have taken the fall for the legal and ethical cowardice of a coach who plans on leading his team onto the field this Saturday for a game that most people will find repugnant.