REFLECTIONS ON AUTHENTICITY

Stepping out of the bubble and learning to be transparent is an important step in personal growth. One may say, “I want you to accept the part of me that appears unacceptable, because that is all I have.” The healing comes when the person realizes that their less than admirable side can be integrated into the whole of their personality. “I am good enough. I can live within my own skin.”

Authentic people demonstrate integrity. They are honest with themselves and others and are respected for their values and convictions. They are not afraid to tell you who they are. There is a transparency about the way they communicate. You really know these people. You don’t have to try to get to know them. They radiate enthusiasm and positive energy. They understand their limitations and utilize their strengths. They are a joy be around. Authentic people are relaxed because they are not afraid of what other think of them. They recognize that their inner voice is more convincing and important than all the other clamoring voices in their sphere of influence. They are not afraid to make difficult decisions, after recognizing what the consequences might be. They stay out of the bubble because life is more enriching and fulfilling.

Those who are authentic understand their limits. They perform within a set of reasonable boundaries. They are not unrealistic about expectations for themselves and others. They do not get caught up in the burden of other’s feelings. They are able to stay appropriately detached. They are neither too weak nor arrogant. They are not overly impressed by their own success and material possessions, and do not compare their worth or financial status with others. They treat people with respect regardless of one’s economic status or financial resources.

Sheldon B. Kopp, author and psychotherapist used to say, “No one is any stronger or any weaker than anyone else. The moment we think we are, we have deceived ourselves.” Authenticity means learning to accept our place in life. Authentic people live rather effortlessly, without striving, anticipating, or comparing themselves to others.

James P. Krehbiel is an author, contributing writer, and cognitive-behavioral therapist practicing in Scottsdale, Arizona. He recently released his new book, Stepping Out of the Bubble: Reflections on the Pilgrimage of Counseling Therapy. His book can be purchased at http://www.booklocker.com/2242.html. James can be reached at http://www.krehbielcounseling.com.